Beyonce’s “Cowboy Carter” has taken over our lives and I am here for it. This got me thinking this week about how music is such an integral part of our lives and our memories.
When I think of certain people and certain eras in my life, my mind often goes to music.
When I think of my mother, I think of old school ballads by Camilo Sesto, Juan Gabriel, Rocio Jurado. Grief at times has made it difficult to access memories over these past few months since her death. In these moments, I’ve played those songs she had on repeat when I was growing up: Perdóname, Algo Se Me Fue Contigo, Hasta Que Te Conocí. Tears come and the block dissipates. I remember her mopping the house on Saturday mornings, the smell of King Pine encircles her, her eyes are closed, head is thrown back and she is singing along a to’ lo que da. Her expression reminds me of people when they are worshipping something.
When I think of my adolescence in Bushwick, Brooklyn, I think of freestyle music and that, in turn, reminds me of my sister, her teased her, her style of dress, how I worshipped her.
My brother is all Depeche Mode, early Madonna and U2.
My Millie, the butch who raised me, is old school salsa by Eddie Santiago and Tito Nieves, and the disco song “You Can Ring My Bell.”
If you asked me who my favorite singer is, I will without hesitation say Sade. Forever Sade. I have cried to her music, cleaned to her music, written to her music, sat still and brooded to her music. When my wife and I first fell in love, I told her that if she loved me, she would take me to see Sade when she has her next concert. She has specific instructions: “We have to be so close that she can spit on me.”
The Prompt
What artist or artists are your forever faves? Why? What memories come cascading in?
When you think of eras in your life, your childhood, adolescence, college years, when you first fell in love, etc., what songs and/or artists come to mind? Why? What memories are connected to these songs and artists?
Make a list of three people who come up in your stories often. For each, write a list of the music you connect to them. What specific songs and genres? Explain why the music triggers memories of these people. What are these memories? Try to show scenes.
Do the same for the places you write often about. For example, when I think of boarding school in Wellesley, MA, the soundtrack includes Bob Marley, Nirvana and Red Hot Chili Peppers. I remember school dances and hearing Marley’s “Legend” for the first time sitting cross legged on the rug in my host parent’s living room.
The Pearl
People have asked me so many times how I’ve gotten published, how I know so many people in the industry, how I’ve done what I’ve done. They want me to introduce them to editors, writers, agents. They want an inside scoop. What they don’t realize is they are missing a key step: being a literary citizen. I’m pretty sure I’ve offered this insight before, but I’ll say it again because it’s just that important and bears repeating.
The literary community at large, in your town, online and beyond, is full of writers who need and want your support as much as you need and want theirs. But how do you meet them? What does being a literary citizen look like? Really that’s up to you, but I can tell you what it looked like for me.
When I lived in New York City, I went to literary events all the time. I was, as Latinx folks say, “hasta en la soap” which translates to “I was even in the soup”, a fresh way of saying that I was everywhere. I went to readings, open mics, book launches, literary festivals. I hosted my own poetry series for a short while—La Loba Poetry Series stand up! I took classes and workshops. I met writers online. I traveled to meet writers and take classes and workshops. I made it my business to show up and show out. I read and shared my work, I started a blog, I created Writing Our Lives and later the Writing the Mother Wound Movement. I did the work. If you want this life, so should you.
i love this prompt. i'm going to spend a bunch of time with it and see where it goes!